Parenting Time: Schedules Make Harmony

Clients often ask us: “What’s the usual access schedule for kids?”  The Family Law Act now says: “parenting time” for what used to be “access”.  It’s true that there are a few common schedules the courts order:

·         week on / week off;

·         weekdays with the non-working parent / alternate weekends with the working one, with some mid-week visits;

·         2-2-3; and

·         2-2-5-5.

There is no “usual schedule”.  A parenting schedule must be practical: If Mom is a firefighter working 4 on / 4 off – giving her parenting on a 2-2-3 schedule won’t work.  If Dad has to travel a lot for his work, ordering week on / week off doesn’t work.  If one parent lives in another province, then none of the above will work. 

The regular schedule should fit the circumstances of the parents.

In addition to the “regular” parenting time, a good schedule will also deal with statutory holidays (Family Day, Easter, Spring Break, etc.).  Other special days include Mother’s Day (always with Mom); Father’s Day (always with Dad); the child’s birthday.  Vacation time needs to be sorted: if one parent only gets two weeks vacation, giving them all of July may not be sensible.  Other Days may be important: Name Days for many Orthodox Christians.  There are special holy days depending on religion: Moslems don’t care about Easter, but do care about Mawlid al-Nabi (birthday of the Prophet, P.B.U.H.); Hindus and Sikhs care about Diwali; Jews will care about Rosh Hashanah.  Then there’s the whole complication when parents have different religions…

When the parents lived together, they sorted out who spent time with the kids.  Once they separate, there should be a detailed schedule.  The schedule doesn’t mean the parents can’t agree to make changes.  But it reduces the chances of conflict (and saves lawyer’s fees) if each parent – and the kids – can look at a calendar and see who will be with the kids next week, next month, next statutory holiday.  If Dad has Michelle the week of 21-27 March, he knows he has to get groceries by the 20th, etc.  Mom knows that she can have a “girls’ night”.  They can each book tickets to take the kids to concerts on “their” days.  They can plan trips during vacation. 

Clarity creates harmony.  Lack of clarity creates conflict.  A good parenting schedule increases harmony and reduces conflict.  Better for each parent.  Better for the kids. 

Making a good schedule takes a lawyer who understands that the “usual schedule” may not be the “right” one for these parents.  It takes a lawyer who can give clear guidance. That’s why we are Clear Legal.

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